4 Ways To Waste Time at Work For Hunting Addicts
Work can be a drag, but thanks to these 4 strategies your work week can be bearable.
By: Skyler Jones
I don’t know about you, but I hate my job. I sit in a cubicle 8 hours a day looking at spreadsheets, every second wishing I were somewhere else, doing something else. There are days that I don’t blink for what feels like hours as my body slowly decays into a chair that I spend 40 hr a week in. It’s depressing to even write about it.
I’ll be honest, it’s tough to get through the workday without taking mental breaks and switching my brain back into hunting mode. I’ll be even more honest and tell you that some of those breaks last hours. Don’t tell.
With that said, the following is a list of activities that I do to waste time at work:
Google Maps
Dude, this is probably my favorite thing to do on the internet. As we all know digital scouting can help you help in a variety of ways. I find it beneficial in the way of having a full-time job and being a father of 3. When I can go out and scout, I pull up the map and settle in for a long session of scrolling in and out of terrain features, zooming in and out of different pinch points and looking for areas that might have good bedding cover. Be careful, this is addicting and you may get caught especially if one of those sessions lasts 6 hours and you forget to turn in a report that that was due at the end of the day.
YouTube
Warning, this activity is a bit dangerous as you will have an actual video playing on your computer screen. If you are going to do this I recommend doing a couple things. I always have a ton of different windows open on my computer, that way if someone sneaks up on me I can quickly click on another window to cover the YouTube player. I make sure to have a project up on my computer to make it look like I am in the process of working on it. When in all actuality, I’m preventing myself from jumping out of a window by watching something that I actually give a shit about. Another good idea is to have a word document open. And on that word document, in bold font, type the word “BREAK”. This way when other employees walk up behind you and see you watching your favorite high county mule deer hunt, they will also see a note indicating you are on a break and that you are on your own time. Again, be careful, because if you have been on break for 4 hours, that might kick off some suspicion.
Hunting Podcasts
This is an easy one to cover up as you can minimize the podcast player window and make it look like you are doing work, or god forbid, you actually do work. But, because I do really hate everything about my job, I like to take a couple excessive steps to make it look like I am really working. Just like when watching a YouTube video, I have multiple windows open that hold different project on them. I place one hand on my keyboard and one hand on my mouse and stare aimlessly at my screen. That way when my heavy breathing overweight boss who smells like a mixture of cigarettes and coffee walks by my desk he thinks I’m busting my ass. Then again, I am daydreaming about literally anything else than what I am supposed to be doing.
Take a Dump
There are days where I will go to the bathroom for anywhere between 3o minutes to an entire hour and flip through Instagram, Facebook, or visit my favorite hunting gear websites. This is an easy one to get away with because if anyone questions where you have been, all you need to say is that you were in the bathroom. Nobody has ever questioned my bowel movements and if they do I will make them feel really uncomfortable and tell them I have IBS.
In closing, there are ways to make those hellish 40 hour work weeks a little more enjoyable while still collecting a full-time paycheck. Just remember to be smart about your time wasting and be sure to cover all of your bases... and tracks. That way you can be like me and make your 15-year dead end job seem little more enjoy about and collect that 40-hour paycheck when only actually working 6 hours a week.
God Bless!
Skyler Jones
